Round peg, square hole

A ‘click’ or ‘gang’, basically any group of people that always hang together, is something I have never quite grown accustom too. In high school I could not stomach continuous separation of clicks and the way they mimicked and mocked one another trying to prove their status in the complicated teenage years. I was friends with everyone, and it got me into quite a few sticky situations. I would be friends with the skater or rebellious types that would wear backwards hats and air Jordan’s to school and then the popular group that would come to school head to toe in Abercrombie and Fitch. Then there was me, in my Hollister skirt, shirt from Target, and shoes that looked like air force one’s. Now, I clearly did not fit into any mold and was not willing to change for any ‘click’ that would demand it.  I hated how the individuals in these groups never had any accountability or responsibility for their actions. Afterall, everyone agreed on the 'right' things to do together. I would listen to one group talk badly about the other, day in and day out, and I would be in neutral awkward positions not understanding why everyone couldn’t get along? Now, this may be naive, but I still feel that way today. I mean we can at least be cordial and respectful of one another. Why must we be so judgmental and so harsh and try to force everyone to be exactly like us?

My determination of who became my friend was purely based on right and wrong. I could not be friends with a mean girl or any boy who enjoyed putting someone else down. I would always be the girl chiming in to stand up for the underdog getting annihilated by some jerk, both in high school and in college. I’ve even had friends get mad at me for stepping in to help someone in need when that person was in trouble, because our ‘group’ had some place to be. Well, you better believe I told the ‘group’ to keep it moving while I helped whoever it was that was in trouble. Shouldn’t we all learn how to humble ourselves to another person’s position?  I stand up for people who I know deserve it or need it, friend or stranger, and I determine my actions on the moral code I know for right and wrong. This is still how I determine my friends today; people who live their lives with this same sense of love and care for others.

Now, my actions are wrong quite often, but I pray about my choices daily hoping to become better at making the right ones. One thing I will never do though is bend to a group mentality, to a clicks way of thinking, to a choice someone else wants me to make. At the end of the day I answer to God alone, and my actions will be judged by him when I die, so everyone else’s opinion means slim to none in the long run. I want to be who He calls me to be. Most of the time that includes fighting for the little guy, going against the grain, and sometimes standing alone in my decisions; but I wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Do not conform to the ways of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2